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Saturday - March 02, 2002
A Watched Pot Always Boils


There is a bizarre constant in being a phone slut.

No matter when you put the soup on the stove, the phone will ring. The moment you realize you have to pee, the john you're on the phone with will want to go two hours. And he won't be one of the ones who likes to listen to that sort of thing.

I am not exactly sure what is responsible for this sadistic twist on Murphy's Law, but it sincerely fucks with a phone slut's head. You go an hour without a call. You put some water on to boil, toss in a little salt and olive oil. The water starts to bubble. You pour in your pasta and...

*ring*

And all you can think is just…FUCK.

I have not had anything al dente since I started this job. You get a hamburger patty sizzling just right in a frying pan - the onions just beginning to caramelize…and…

*ring*

You're watching a great thriller and the murderer is just about to…

Well, you get the idea.

I'm gonna go eat my mushy linguine.




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